Greetings: More Than Just "Bonjour"

The Sacred "Bonjour"

Never underestimate the power of "bonjour." In France, this simple word is not optional—it's the key that unlocks every social interaction. Enter a shop without saying bonjour to the proprietor? Expect chilly service. Start a question without this greeting? You've already marked yourself as rude.

Cultural Context Box: The Philosophy of Bonjour

"Bonjour" literally means "good day," but it signifies much more. It's an acknowledgment of the other person's humanity, a sign of respect, and a social contract. By saying bonjour, you're essentially saying, "I recognize you as a person worthy of courtesy." Skipping it suggests you view others as mere functionaries.

The timing matters too: - Bonjour: Used until roughly 5 or 6 PM - Bonsoir: Evening greeting, typically after 5 PM - Bonne journée/Bonne soirée: Said when departing (have a good day/evening) - Salut: Casual hi/bye among friends only

La Bise: The Cheek Kiss Decoded

Perhaps no French custom causes more anxiety for visitors than la bise. This cheek-kissing greeting varies wildly across France, and even French people sometimes get it wrong.

The Basic Mechanics: 1. Lean in, usually starting with the right cheek 2. Make light cheek contact (or air kiss near the cheek) 3. Make a subtle kissing sound 4. Repeat on the other side (number varies by region)

When to Faire la Bise: - Meeting friends and acquaintances in social settings - Greeting colleagues in some workplaces (though this is changing) - Being introduced at social gatherings - Arriving at and leaving parties

When NOT to Faire la Bise: - Professional first meetings (handshake instead) - With service providers (shopkeepers, waiters) - When someone extends a hand instead - During health concerns (COVID has changed norms)

Regional Variations: The Bise Map

- Paris: Usually two kisses - Provence: Three kisses - Nantes/Western France: Four kisses - Some areas: Just one kiss

Inclusive Tip: Navigating Greetings with Disabilities

If you have mobility limitations or prefer not to faire la bise, a warm smile and verbal greeting are perfectly acceptable. You might say, "Bonjour, enchanté(e)" while placing your hand over your heart—a gesture that conveys warmth without physical contact.

What's Changing: Post-Pandemic Greetings

COVID-19 has made greeting flexibility more acceptable. The "check-hug" (a brief shoulder bump) has appeared among young people, and the elbow bump gained temporary acceptance. Many workplaces have moved away from obligatory bise-ing, making professional interactions less physically intimate.