Visiting French Homes

The Honor of an Invitation

Being invited to a French home is significant. French people typically socialize in cafés and restaurants, reserving home invitations for established relationships.

When Invited, Remember: - Arrive 10-15 minutes late (le quart d'heure parisien) - Never arrive early - Bring a gift (see below) - Compliment the home - Don't explore without invitation - Offer to help, but accept "non" gracefully

Gift Giving Etiquette

Excellent Choices: - Quality wine (unless you're unsure of their taste) - Flowers (odd numbers, not chrysanthemums or carnations) - Premium chocolates - Specialty items from your homeland - Books (if you know their interests) - Artisanal food products

What to Avoid: - Knives (suggests cutting the relationship) - Chrysanthemums (funeral flowers) - Red roses (romantic implication) - Wine, if dining with wine experts (unless exceptional) - Anything too expensive (creates obligation)

Cultural Context Box: The Flower Code

French flower etiquette is specific. Chrysanthemums are for graves, carnations bring bad luck, and red roses imply romance. White flowers can suggest mourning. When in doubt, ask the florist for "un bouquet pour mes hôtes" (a bouquet for my hosts).

Dinner Party Dynamics

French dinner parties follow an orchestrated progression:

1. Apéritif (30-60 minutes): Light drinks, perhaps olives or nuts, conversation 2. Entrée: First course, often lighter 3. Plat Principal: Main course 4. Fromage: Cheese course (before dessert) 5. Dessert: Something sweet 6. Café: Coffee (after dessert, never with) 7. Digestif: Perhaps cognac or similar

Expect to spend 3-4 hours minimum. Rushing suggests you're not enjoying yourself.

Inclusive Tip: Dietary Restrictions

While French cuisine traditionally centers on meat and dairy, hosts increasingly accommodate dietary needs. Inform your host in advance, saying something like: "Je dois vous prévenir que je suis végétarien/végane/allergique à..." Offering to bring a dish you can eat shows consideration.